The Uses of Sorrow

Someone I loved once gave me a box full of darkness.

It took me years to understand that this, too, was a gift.

—Mary Oliver

Psychotherapy is both a science and an art.  Research shows that modalities and theories do not significantly differ in their effectiveness for change.  What this proves is that a considerable part of the therapeutic process is the transformation that occurs in being in a safe and loving relationship.  

A skilled therapist will reflect back to you who you truly are (most of us do not have “clean mirrors” in our lives, nor such honesty in relationship) to help you understand your impact on others and the ripple effects that may occur in your way of relating.  This way of relating typically creates a pattern in our lives that may cause unnecessary suffering and pain, loneliness and emptiness in our relationships.

A good therapist will also help you to heal old wounds and false beliefs about yourself and the world in the context of the therapeutic relationship.  In this safe place, you can explore and experience a healthy and unconditional relationship.


Watch this video on why it can be better to talk to a therapist than a friend: